is me is really me

early June 2012

I had never realized a woman would have to struggle to keep her hands off a man, but here I was, digging my nails into my palms, staring at the inside of my eyelids as though I could maybe see through them if I peered hard enough.” – Dead to the World 

so very happy to be able to touch you again, i didn’t want to stop. even in the slightest of movements whether with sexual intent or not, i had to touch you. almost as if to convince myself that you’re really here….i can feel your leg under my fingertips, the rise of muscle, the coarse hair and i open my eyes, realizing we, or at least i, must have fallen asleep after a rather quick, yet incredibly satisfying, mid-afternoon romp after meeting back up at your room. i’m laying on my stomach and i am vaguely aware of the sheets thrown lightly over me stopping just below my breast line and my head laying flat on the mattress turned towards a night stand. i’m relieved to see that it’s really only 4:00pm and my nap was just about an hour. moving my head to the other side i come face to face with your thigh and realize that 1) you are sitting up working on your laptop and 2) my left arm is semi-draped over you thigh. looking up i find you looking at me through the corner of your eye where the grin on your mouth has traveled to your blue eyes as a twinkle “welcome back sleepyhead” you mouth to me while pointing at your ear. oh-you really are working, following up on something online while talking to whomever via the bluetooth device. i merely lean over a bit to place a slight kiss on your thigh. rolling over on my back i go to sit up like you when you put your left arm around me and jockey around a bit so that i end up semi-leaning/laying on your left side. you nudge me and point to my laptop, raising your eyebrow as if asking me if i want you to reach for mine. i shake my head no, i would rather just lounge here on you for a while as i start to wake from my dreamless nap. the tv is on with the volume turned down low and i simply listen to you typing and speaking to one customer or another as well as follow-up calls to answer questions from the office. i glance up again, just so i can see your face and you give me this apologetic shrug as you point to the screen. “i’m sorry” your actions beg…i gently shake my head and simply kiss your cheek so you know it’s all good. i slide back down a bit and realize that i didn’t put any clothes back on and i am indeed, semi- reclining naked with my back touching you. content, i close my eyes as my fingers start to absentmindely trace patterns on your thigh and the arm you have slung over my shoulders. no kissing, no tongue, just touching you. because i want to, because i can. pretty soon i feel your hands and fingers doing the same thing…one hand playing lightly with my shoulder, collarbone and upper arm-soft lines or tender caresses up down, around and around. it was touching for the sake of touching and not an end goal. i could touch you for hours on end. all of the touching begins to feed a slow yet relaxed yearning in me and as you have done so far all week, you seem to know that i am enjoying this slow, sensual, silent touching. soon i hear the click of you shutting your laptop and saying goodbye to the person via blue tooth.

simply lounging, relaxed, no talking, no words were needed as we both just enjoyed touching one another. as the local news comes on in the background i find my self ever so softly touching your cock, stroking the shaft and spending a lot of time tracing the head of your cock with my fingertips and i am so simply aroused and thoroughly enjoying the way your large hands feel massaging one breast, then the other, sometimes tighter and sometimes with the barest of touches. my breathing hitches when you stop to tweak and tease my nipples. suddenly my mind goes into overdrive, as its these moments between us that set my heart racing and my legs try to squeeze together as if trying to apply pressure and friction to.that.spot. aah yes, i gasp when your touches are no longer slow and deliberate but instead demanding and possessive. you lean down to greedily take one of my breasts in your mouth, making my desire for you shoot stabbing pains of pleasure through my core. by now i am more fully on my side, licking you, tracing your collarbone and your shoulders with my hand. i am so loving your touch and can feel my juices start to flow. you inhale and i gasp as the cold air you take into your mouth swipes over my nipple to the further stiffen it to the point of permanent hardness,  while you tease my pussy with your fingers before sticking two in and “oh my god that feels so, so , so good.” i mutter as my eyes start to roll into the back of my head., and i shudder as you start to fuck me hard, curling them in just the right way i yell out “fuck” and i hear your voice and feel the vibration against my skin “indeed, i want you to cum by me fucking your pussy like this, with just my hands, my fingers and my mouth.” i can only stutter out…”oh, oh, oohhh”

it’s as if my pussy can’t help itself and i am pushing against your hand, and arch up as if i am begging you to probe deeper into my core. i realize you are positioned across my body and that leaves just the angle and opening i need to shift my position and take your semi-erect cock into my mouth again and grab and tease your balls, grab your ass to bring you deeper in. as i bob my head up and down and grab your ass you suddenly lean in and close over my clit and suck. hard. you have to hold me down so as not to buck too high and i let out a long low moan that vibrates throughout my mouth and throat earning me a gasp of delight. i gently kiss the head of your cock and i lick my way back from the top of your inner thigh in order to take one of your balls into my mouth and suck, hard and  I do it all over again with the other making sure to spend equal time with both of them. your hand gently caresses my inner thigh and they fall back as if it’s the most natural thing to do giving you access to my pussy and i am wet, i mean wet with anticipation and as i feel your breath on my skin and just over my clit when you suddenly clamp down on it and start to work that magic, when the sensations are so powerful my mind goes blank. just as suddenly you have maneuvered me back onto my stomach and you grab my hips and pull them up to yours, your hands spreading my ass cheeks so you can rub your hard cock up and down my now flowing juices before thrusting in. OMMM God! i start to buck, push my hips back while wiggling, my muscles clenching and unclenching enjoying the feel of you between my legs. Just as suddenly i feel your hands on my shoulders, pushing me down and pulling your cock all of the way out of me only to slam back into me, sending shudders throughout my body. “harder tom, please, harder. it’s okay, don’t wait for me i’m almost there” i reach back to spread my ass cheeks for you so you can place one hand against the backboard and the other to grip my hip as you literally pound yourself into my welcoming hot core over, and over, and over again when suddenly you let out that fucking sexy, low growl as you cum hard and hot and my pussy tries to milk it for all of it’s tasty goodness…