Every day, it’s a choice to work on your relationship every day. To pay attention. To care. To ride the tide and decide. We have been in counseling just over a year. It’s hard. It’s not a silver bullet. It’s knowing that we are working to get healthy. Whether or not the end game is remaining married. Or not. We both just know that we don’t want to make the same mistakes in the future.
Last month, a newer friend, asked me why didn’t I just leave. *sigh* no matter what many think. it isn’t that simple. While my marriage is seriously broken, maybe even irrevocably, the decision to end a marriage, or any relationship has many facets to be considered. I am incredibly proud of the posts that Lady M (The Woman Invisible) has posted regarding her divorce and post-divorce issues. Not because they are unexpected but because she acknowledges that she was likely not ready for it on some levels, and still needs to work through her own feelings and reactions in order to get healthy. It takes a lot to admit that, post a decision.
The last few months have been incredibly challenging when it comes to our counseling. We both has past feelings we have buried for so long that working through it is necessary before we can address much of what we have yet to work through. It’s a decision every day to be willing to work through the past to get towards a healthier, if yet uncertain future.